Long Time No See!!

It has been so long since I opened this blog and wrote anything down! The last thing I wrote about were times in Ethiopia and that was over four years ago. Time flies :)

So, to catch you up on the big points in the last four years...

• We left Ethiopia and decided that, instead of returning to Winnipeg, we wanted to move to Toronto. 
• We moved to TO in the fall of  2014. This is a big city!! 
• Jeff got a job and then a different one and then did something different and is now a technology researcher.
• I got a job teaching adults math and physics (real over simplification!) and  this was pretty awesome!

And, hopefully in a couple weeks or so, the next bullet point on that list will be

• We became foster parents!

We are on the precipice of a pretty huge change in life! To become a foster parent (also called a resource family) in Ontario, there are a lot of classes, meetings and information to process. We're at the tail end of that and are just waiting for the final report to be written and a final home inspection. Assuming that we are approved, we're hoping to have kids join our family sometime this fall. (As fits with my personality, I want this to happen sooner than later, preferably next week :) )

Some day, I'll write about learning to deal with waiting.... and waiting..... (maybe when I've figured out how to do it better!) and I'll write more details about the process for anyone interested, but today I just wanted to share my excitement. I get to be a mom, everyone!!!! Do you know how awesome that is?! I put the final touches on our kids room this week and, as I saw it come together with kids books on the dressers and stuffies in the corner, my soul sighed and said "finally." 

Stay tuned! I'm going off Facebook soon so this blog will be my primary publicly accessible face.

Speaking of Time

You remember how I said that a second is a second and a minute is a minute in my last post? In Ethiopia, an hour is an hour but once it gets to days, things change up a bit. Its kinda cool how this country can change how they measure time. The day starts around sunrise (which is equivalent to what I'd call 6am). So, when my phone tells me 7am, most of their phones would say 1am. Lunch is around 6am and supper around 12am. 11pm for them is 5 am for me and so on. I'm not sure if they change their date at my midnight or if they wait for daybreak to say its the next day. It took me forever to realize that all the clocks in businesses and vehicles that I saw weren't broken! Seriously-- it took me until December to figure that one out even though I knew about the different way of measuring. It just took me awhile to put it all together.

Months are also different. One of the touristy taglines for posters advertising Ethiopia is "Thirteen months of sunshine." Twelve months of the year have 30 days and the thirteenth has 5 or 6, depending on the year. It gets even trickier. Their New Year starts around September 11 on my calendar so their new months are half way through our months. And it doesn't stop there! Right now, its 2006 here. My receipts are stamped with 2006-- it always gives me a double take. As far as I know, the years have the same amount of days as our calendar does.

Isn't that cool?! It totally plays with my mind, but I think its neat that there is a country in the world (maybe more than one for all I know) that measures time different than me. So many different things in the world!

Measuring Time

Time is a fascinating thing, isn't it? Sometimes it goes slow, sometimes it flies by, sometimes it manages to do both at the same time-- all the while a second takes a second and a minute a minute. It feels like a combination of yesterday and forever ago that we arrived in Ethiopia. I clearly remember how hard jet lag hit and how disoriented I was for a while and that sure feels like more than 7 months ago. But, that's all it is. 7 months. Not near long enough, but, due to paperwork, we'll be coming back to Canada soon. In the classroom where I teach my two sister in laws and two other girls, we've got a couple count downs going on and one of them is until I leave-- 16 days today. Yikes! I can't really comprehend that. It wasn't instantaneous, but this has become my home. The feel, the people, the pace, the food, the friends. I have a space here where I kinda fit. Sigh. It makes me sad to think about it too much. I love the rhythms of life here. Our guard coming on duty at night and always being glad to see us. Walking along the edge of the road since they are still working on reconstructing the road here. Knocking on gates and hearing people say "Mano?"(Who's there?) Struggling with the greetings, but graciously getting smiles back. Walking across the street to the little shop to buy our bread and eggs for breakfast or to the other shop to pick up injerra for lunch. Spending quiet nights with few interruptions with just Jeff and I.

But, I'm leaving home to go home. Lately, I've gotten some really encouraging emails from people who love me and have taken the time to journey vicariously with me to the other side of the world, which have really encouraged me to know that I'm not alone in this space of change. My sisters are rearranging their living space so we have somewhere to crash when we first get back. I'm thrilled that I'll get to hug all the little people in my life who change so much in such a short time. I can't wait to see my dad and see how his back is doing and give my mom a hug and squeeze her so she knows how much I missed her. I've been holding on to a hug for someone who has suffered while I've been away and I haven't been able to be there for her and now, I'll finally be able to give it to her. I'll be able to read with my sister and niece in grade one and be thrilled with the little readers they are becoming. My sister in Kindergarten can show me all the letters she can write now and how high she can count and show me the book she found that says 'Ethiopia'. My brother can share with me his latest minecraft creations... or just be really excited that now Jeff is home and can get it working again for him. I can hear about my sister's missions trip to Mexico. I can tuck in my sister who's in Grade 6 (if she still lets me) and really hear about her heart in a way that just doesn't come through in emails. And the list goes on. There is so much love to go home to.

But, this'll be hard, guys. I am going home and leaving home. Joy and sorrow. Fear and excitement. Can I be strong? Can I do this well? Transition hasn't really been my strong point. Will the words I find to share my past months scratch the surface, or will they cause confusion? Have I missed too much? Can I share the gold nuggets of life I've found to those I love and care about? Can I make a difference in the side of the world where I speak the same language, but often can't find the right words? Sigh.

I'm coming home.

Easter Traditions

Happy Easter! A little belated, I know, but I've been too busy eating meat to do anything other than eat and then lie horizontally, moaning quietly. Okay, maybe that's a little exaggeration, but I have had 4 Easter meals in two days and am currently skipping another one in favor of some nice quiet time at home.

Ethiopians have been preparing for Easter for months already. It is the biggest holiday of the year (Christmas is almost a non-event) and feasting abounds this weekend. Let me back up a little. The majority of the population are Ethiopian Orthodox. While I have barely scratched the surface of understanding the complexities of this belief system, one thing I have figured out is that it offers a rich culture of rhythms and community through out the year to Ethiopians. Driving past the churches, I'll see people kneeling, crossing themselves or bowing towards the church to show their respect. Bajages (the main form of transportation that is quite fun!) are decked out with crosses, religious symbols, etc. You can see the influences throughout every sector of life. It's nothing like western cultures where religion and talking about God or Jesus is a fairly tricky, sometime taboo, topic. Here, it is almost the opposite.

One of the parts of Ethiopian Orthodox belief/ tradition that has most effected me has been their practice of fasting. Weekly, they adhere to a vegan (do animal products) diet two days a week-- Wednesday and Friday. If Jeff and I want to go to a restaurant to get meat, we don't go on fast days since all we'd get is fish. Buying meat on a fast day is tricky since part of the fast involves not killing animals on that day. It still is possible, we'd just have to find a restaurant/shop that is run by someone of other beliefs, or find somewhere that caters to foreigners. There is a short fast of a couple weeks around Christmas time and then comes Easter, a couple months later. The Easter fast lasts for 55 days! Most people in the country have not had meat, milk, eggs, etc. for almost two months! Its no wonder there is feasting for days upon days with tonnes of meat. And its not just this weekend--for the next 40 days, this is the only time of the year when there are no weekly fast days.

So, last week, on Thursday night, we went sleep with sound of a bleating sheep and goat in our back 'yard.' Our landlady, who lives on the compound with us, is Orthodox and wealthy enough to have several animals so we laughed at our serenade. Apparently, most people will start butchering in the middle of the night on Sunday as soon as their tradition allows so that they can have the food prep done for their big meal.

Jeff and I enjoyed meals with our friend, Rekik, and her family on Sunday followed by a pizza supper with friends (non Ethiopian if you couldn't guess that from the menu). Jeff raved about the delicious sheep for hours after. He said it was the perfect meal- he is such an Ethiopian. :) On Monday, I enjoyed lunch with Jeff's parents guard and his family. That meal had me raving for a couple hours-- wow! That was some good food! I was about to try and describe it and then I realized that words wouldn't do it justice, but trust me, it was good. Monday evening, we were invited to a feast with our landlady and her family and then we rolled ourselves home and went to bed.

Well, this is a bit of a hodge podge post, but its kinda hard to encapsulate an event rich in traditions that I hardly understand. But, it was inspiring to be here and observe the dedication of the Orthodox in allowing their beliefs to shape their daily menu for 55 days and then to be part of the celebration of Jesus raising from the dead with them.

Real Life

So, what does that mean and why does it feel like my time in Ethiopia is somehow a break from "real life?" Why does the thought of being back in Canada feel a little intimidating because I'll be re-entering the 'real' world? Why do the patterns and lifestyle choices that I've developed here not hold the same weight as the patterns and lifestyle choices that I practice in Canada. Why does being stressed out feel more 'real' than being a lot less stressed (haven't quite gotten to not stressed)? Why do I feel like I'm cheating the system? I think I have some ideological deconstruction to do.

Can I come home and integrate more peaceful, soulful, and grateful patterns into my lifestyle? I feel like when I get home, I have to think about all the stuff that society tells me to think about. I "have to" care what I wear (I wear the same clothes pretty much all the time here- social faux pas!!). I "have to" maintain a certain level of visible, tangible productivity in what often feels like an attempt to justify my existence. I "have to" find a job that somehow manages to be a meaningful expression of my talents and pays the bills. I "have to" start planning what the next step is and be on a path of some sort or have something that I am striving for. And the list seems like it could go on.

Now, don't get me wrong. Each of those things has its place (although the pressure to conform to some ideal 'looking good' in clothing may not). For example, I want to do meaningful things and be productive in life. I love living a life that makes a difference. But, here, it feels like I am okay and from that base of okay-ness its a privilege to find opportunities to do that make a difference. Nobody here is looking at me and saying I do or don't do enough. At home, there isn't anybody saying it but it still feels like its there. Really strongly, actually. Why is that? Is it me? Is it church? Is it Western culture? I kinda don't think its just me. I see the constant striving all around. Whether its striving for perfection, Godliness, money, security, recognition, knowledge or relationships, it kinda seems like its everywhere. Can I somehow develop a shield that protects me from myself and my culture that tells me that I always need to strive? I must say, its easier to reject it from the outside, but its really hard not to judge myself using the same standards that I reject from others.

Its all swirling inside me right now-- who do I want to be and how do I get there and live in Canada? Can I learn for myself that these last many months in a different country have been as much real life as if I'd lived them in Canada? Can I stand against the internal and external pressures to conform to striving? Can I be strong enough to hold on to this tenuous grip I have on a more peaceful perspective? This week, it feels daunting. I'm excited to see friends and family again (I miss all the little people in my life!), but it all feels a little scary right now. But-- its what I really, really want... so that is what I'll strive for. :)

Being an Employer

Economics and stuff like that have never been a keen interest of mine, but it doesn't really take any smarts to recognize the high unemployment rate here. I think one in five people (or 20%) don't have a job. That doesn't take into account those who are underemployed or working in a field other than the one they were trained in. Its a staggering number.

One of the big sectors of jobs around here are house workers and guards. It is normal for anyone who can afford it to have guards watching their property 24/7 and house workers who help tackle the laundry, cooking, cleaning and child care. I must say, it was a bit weird for me to get used to. We have one guard at night instead of a day guard and night guard, which is a little different than most foreigners, and a house worker that works once a week. The guard thing is easy for me to get used to. We are obviously wealthier than most of the people in the country so it makes sense to me to have someone hang out at night and keep an eye on things. But, having a house worker was a bit harder for me to adjust to.

For the first couple months, we didn't have one and I took great pride in getting the laundry washed and hanging on the line before 8am so that when I got back from teaching, my clothes were nice and dry and then afternoons were sometimes spent cleaning or picking up stuff from the market. I was getting a little tired of the early mornings and wanting to help someone out, so Jeff arranged to hire Zawdie in November as part of my birthday present. My goodness, was it awkward for me! I sat on the couch and watched her as she did my laundry, cleaned my house, did my dishes and made some lunch. It felt weird!!! But at the same time, it felt good. Most people here could always use a little more money and we were able to supplement her part time wages, which she sent to the country side to help out her family. And it didn't take long for me to get used to leaving my house to go to work on Tuesday morning and coming home at lunch to a clean kitchen, shiny floors and clothes drying in the sun!

Zawdie has started working full time at her other job, so we have another house worker starting this week. Her name is Imawiash and she actually knows Jeff from when he was growing up here. I'm excited to be able to offer someone a job. Its unwise, and often hurtful, to just give out money to people, but giving someone work values them and their abilities rather than making them feel like a charity case. Giving someone a job, even if its temporary, feels like giving something all around positive. So, I've haven't done dishes since after supper yesterday so that by tomorrow, there will be a good counter full of dishes. It took awhile to get used to someone else doing stuff that firmly fall into the 'my work' category, but I must say, I'm kinda getting used to it.

While I'm on the subject of employees, I'll tell you a bit about our guard, Mulukan. Unfortunately, words don't quite suffice to encapsulate his character. Every interaction with him leaves me thinking-- wow, that is a good man. Jeff and I regularly turn to each other and remark on how much we enjoy him. He is gentle and unassuming and eager to help out. His generosity is humbling considering the differences in our finances. He is always bringing us part of whatever he has harvested lately. He farms during the day and guards at night. I doubt he has 'me time' or time to kick back and relax. My guess is his life is more of a dawn-til-dusk working and then do it all over again tomorrow kinda thing. Yet, his gratitude and sincerity and contentedness with life are things that just exude from him. It is a priviledge to get to know him and learn from him about how to live a full life.

 We had him over for some snacks a couple days ago and tried our stilted conversation with his little English and our little Amharic. It was awkward, but at the same time, it felt a little like old friends hanging out. Its weird how that can be.

To the sides you can see some honeycomb dripping with honey that he brought us. It is super tasty and super sweet! To eat it, you take a piece of the waxy honey comb and chew. Then you spit out the wax. Jeff is saving his to make a candle or something. It's kinda like eating honey gum. Mulukan has also brought us corn stalk, which, if harvested early, can be eaten like sugar cane but isn't as hard on the teeth. Its quite yummy.

It has been a privilege to work with our employees and get to know them a little-- I think that the learning that comes from watching them live their lives far outweighs the finances we pay them. We are so blessed.

A Month of Travels

So, here is a long post about what's been going on with us for the last month. We headed into Addis a little earlier than originally planned because my visa was about to run out and all our paperwork isn't working out quite like it was planned-- but that's never really much of a surprise. Anyway, I applied for an extension of my tourist visa and got three months! (I was told that I would get two at most). Its a little nerve racking having paperwork looming over plans. I really love plans that don't change, so not knowing if I'd get an extension or whether that extension would be for only a month was an experience of learning to let go a little for me. So, now Jeff and I both have our paperwork set until the beginning of March, when we'll have to figure out what happens next. We'd like to stay through the school year (end of June). While I'm not a huge fan of Addis (Bahir Dar is so beautiful that I am a little spoiled and don't like the traffic and smoge of Addis), we had the opportunity to stay with some people we know in Addis and it was wonderful to be in their home and meet their girls.

After staying in Addis about a week, we headed off to our first real Christmas destination--Bubooguya. Bubooguya is a facility sort of like a camp. It had cabins and a dining hall and beautiful grounds. There was a tennis court, small playground and about a million stairs to the water front. More importantly, it is a place that holds many memories for Jeff from his childhood and even John, Jeff's dad, has memories of spending time there as a child. So, there is some fun family history to this place. The trees and flowers were absolutely beautiful and Jeff and I had a cute little cabin with a porch where I sat on Christmas eve trying to finish the moccasins I made out of old jeans for Amy and Abby.

Jeff patiently waiting for a fish.

It was an eye opening experience for me- I had no idea my husband loved to fish for tilapia so much! He spent hours and hours carving a bamboo spear, untangling fishing net, creating a box trap, and sitting quietly by the water with his balled up pieces of bread trying to entice the fish to bite. Unfortunately, none of them did, but he had a good time anyway. There were so many fish (mostly minnows) that you could stand at the waters edge and see hundreds of little fish swim around. One morning we woke up at dawn to watch the lake wake up and got to see all the fish and birds together. As a large bird would fly over, the lake would ripple, almost like a wave, as the minnows moved so they didn't become breakfast. It was pretty cool. In the quiet of the morning, we could hear (but not see) a nearby swamp teaming with birds. There were tonnes of flamingos in the swamp as well as a bunch of other birds. It was a beautiful place to spend Christmas!

We, along with Jeff's parents and sisters, enjoyed a lovely dinner of chicken, potatoes, cranberry sauce (did you know you could make cranberry sauce from dried cranberries?), gravy, veggies and shrimp. It was quite a feast and a lot of fun to make. Jeff played chef and I was the the kitchen help. Jeff is quite to cook and knows a lot more about how food works than I do. We cooked the chicken on peeled onions to crisp up the skin- yummy!!


Of course, we had way too much food and had to figure out how we could share it. We invited the staff and other people who were staying there to join us for a leftover buffet the next day. I'm sure the food was a little weird since it was definitely not Ethiopian food, but I think they enjoyed it anyway.

And then we were off to Langano. Langano is a camp run by the organization that Jeff's parents work with that is located on a lake. We stayed in a lovely beach house that had a beautiful screened in porch with a swing. It was the perfect place to relax and listen to the wildlife call to each other.

Jeff and I spent a lot of time trekking through the woods, trying to find birds. I have no clue about all the different kinds of birds, but seem to be able to see things quickly. We made a good team- I saw things and he told me what they were and got pictures. The evening that we got there, Jeff and I went for a walk to see what we could see. In the distance, I saw what I thought was a donkey running away from us. Except it wasn't a donkey-- it was a wild warthog. Apparently those things can be quite dangerous and move quite quickly so we didn't too far off the beaten path. We saw tonnes of different types of birds- turakos, trojans, parrots, starlings, red birds, green birds, yellow ones and then some boring black ones. We saw a gazelle, a sevet cat (larger than a house cat and wild), a couple more wart hogs and tonnes of columbus monkeys. These monkeys just made me smile. I couldn't help it! They are just so cute with their little faces and hands and skunk like appearance. There was also a couple troops of baboons that were close by. Baboons are a bit more intimidating to me since they are definitely more dangerous, so they weren't as cute. But, they were definitely cool to see! Once when we were walking, I glanced to the side and saw the largest baboon of the troop that had just taken off after seeing us. He was standing between us and the rest of the troops, guarding and ready to protect. It is very interesting learning about different animals and watching them to relate to their kind as well as between species.

A couple days later, we were on the road again, this time to a conference at a hot spring hotel in a town called Sodorey. We took the scenic route and got to see the country side living, the changing terrain, ostriches, a head of camels walking down the road (at least 50), termite hills taller than me, and so many cool fig trees. (As a side note, I have decided that my favorite tree is the fig tree and I think I should build a house in one some day. They are massive!) There were at least a hundred adults a hundred adults at this conference and it was a great opportunity to meet a bunch of cool people. There was a speaker there, who was absolutely great, and it was just nice to be able to be together in learning, worship and play with all these others who worked in Ethiopia. It quenched a thirst I didn't recognise I had.

We celebrated the New Year with Jeff learning to blow fire (don't try this at home, kids!) and me going to bed well before midnight. Jeff had a lot of fun playing a game called Resistance and talking to people. I got a video of Jeff blowing fire but it all happens so fast that it just looks like a burst of flame and then it's done.

We stayed there until January 3rd and then headed back to Addis. We couldn't get a bus out of Addis for a couple days so we celebrated Ethiopian Christmas on January 7th in Addis with some delicious food and a nice quiet evening.

So, that is a quick overview of my last month-- events wise at least. I've composed several other half finished blogs about thought processes and will get those finished at some point. I was worried that it would be too much for me to be gone and in transition for so long, but it was good. I am glad to be home and glad that we were able to spend time in all the places we were.

Life is good.